Saturday, April 5

Green Thumb Sunday

It's Green Thumb Sunday, hosted by Tricia at As the Garden Grows. If you'd like to participate, just click on the link to find out how.

I went out into the garden today to check and see how the tulips were doing. They are about 4 inches high. I didn't take a photo, because tulips without blooms aren't much to look at. I was trying to decide what to post for Green Thumb Sunday, as I don't have a lot of indoor plants and I've shown you most of them. Meeko and I took a walk and we saw some shrubs beginning to bud, but they weren't very exciting either.

Finally I decided that I would show you come photos of my flower garden from last year. I love my red Oriental poppies. They grow every year and already the leaves are covering a spot about a foot across. Last year they didn't do very well because we didn't have enough water. One year I had 31 blooms on them and since then they just haven't been the same. I guess they overdid themselves. I had only three blossoms last year, but I do love them.
The blooms on these flowers are always big. I'm hoping that it does better this year and am going to pick up some fertilizer for it. Does anyone know what kind of fertilizer that Oriental poppies like?

The next photo is of my light pink peony. I have 3 peony bushes and the two that are in the same garden need to be separated, I believe. They have spread so much the leaves of the plants are touching each other.
I also have a hot pink and a dark red peony. Every year they bloom profusely and I love the fragrance. I would bring them into the house, but hubby is allergic to a lot of flower fragrances. They make a wonderful showing in the garden though.
After all the rain we got yesterday, it was a bright and sunny day here today, although the breeze definitely still had a bite to it. For some reason I was bored to death. Nothing appealed to me. I think it is because I've been having trouble sleeping lately. On Friday night I was just falling asleep and I heard a noise that woke me. After that, it was hopeless. I was still awake at 3:30 AM but must have finally went to sleep shortly thereafter. The night before that it was 3 AM. So today was a day of restlessness. I would have liked to have taken a nap, but knew if I did I wouldn't sleep tonight. But here it is just after midnight and I'm wide awake. I am going to go to bed though and hopefully once I relax the Sandman will come to visit.

Take care and have a wonderful Sunday. ~Blessings, Mary~
I received an email today from a lady who was directed to my blog by a friend. It seems this lady has a granddaughter who was just recently diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. She explained to me that after reading yesterday's post that she understood a little more about why her granddaughter "acts out."

Remember that each autistic child is different. We cannot just say, "the child has autism" and lump all of those kids into the same group and expect them to react the same way to different circumstances. As with all other children, each autistic child has his/her own personality. Many children that suffer from autism are highly intelligent. It seems that their brains work overtime, yet they don't understand how to communicate what they are thinking. They have a hard time making friends because they don't understand the rules of socializing. Some may be shy, while others are aggressive.

The autism spectrum includes a wide variety of disorders. Some children are "high functioning autistic," as Brandon is. Others are at the low end of the spectrum.

Above is a diagram of the autism spectrum. From what I understand from the research I've done, is that children at the severe end of the spectrum are very easy to identify. Then we come to midsection where autistic traits are more varied. This includes PDD -NOS (Pervasive Developmental Disorder - Not Otherwise Specified.) The less severe or high functioning end of the spectrum, which includes Asperger's Syndrome has the largest number of shapes because of the variation in presentation. This is also the end of the spectrum that has the highest density of population that is affected. The area to the extreme right shows where people on the autism spectrum blend into the general population. Since the autism spectrum is so varied, it is impossible to say that a person who has been diagnosed as autistic will have a particular trait or even that he cannot possess other traits.

When Brandon belonged to the bowling league, there was a girl on his team that had Asperger's Syndrome. Yet the difference between her and Brandon was like day and night. She didn't have the meltdowns like Brandon experienced, but she did have the large head. She possessed much different traits than he did. So every individual case of Asperger's Syndrome or autism, for that matter, can be very different.

It is important for us to teach children that are high functioning autistic all of the things that they will need to know to make it on their own in the world. At one time Brandon had no concept of facial expressions or body language. He wouldn't look you directly in the eye. The Vice Principal that I spoke of the other day made him look her in the eye when she talked to him. She encouraged us to do the same. Today we sometimes still have to remind Brandon to look us in the eye when we are talking to him. However, he has made great progress.

My daughter, Michelle, and I played games with Brandon to learn him about facial expressions. We would exaggerate a face, say a smile, and ask him what it meant. We would exaggerate frowns, glares, make sad faces and knit our eyebrows. Then we would ask him what he thought that particular face meant. I would place my hands on my hips and give him a "look." He was eager to learn and today he does understand most body language.

There has been a recent study done and the results are astounding. While there may never be a cure for autism, researchers are working diligently to try to identify why it is becoming more prevelant in today's society. Post mortems of people who suffered from autism have certainly helped and now five genes have been identified as being contributing factors in some cases. To read more, please follow the link to The Brain & Autism. There is also a diagram posted on the site that will give you a better idea of how the brain is affected when autism is present.

Mary asked me today if I knew where she could buy an autism ribbon. There are items for sale that promotes autism awareness.

CafePress - Look near the top of the screen and you will see a search engine. Set it to "all departments" and then type in the word "autism." There are t-shirts, mugs, bumper stickers, sweatshirts, magnets and so much more for sale here. Be sure to click on "more products" under the items and explore the site thoroughly. Brandon's teacher that he had last year in grade six and has again this year for grade seven loved his "I Teach Someone with Autism and I Learn from Him Everyday," coffee mug. Mr. M is a great teacher for Brandon and we have been truly blessed.

I saw a t-shirt there that I told my hubby I just have to get. It says, "I asked God for a blessing and He gave me my autistic grandson." Truer words have never been spoken. When I get it, which won't be for a while, I will post a photo.

Have a great Saturday and remember not to judge those who are different. After all, wouldn't the world be a boring place if we were all the same? ~Blessings, Mary~

Friday, April 4

Show & Tell Friday and More about Brandon's Autism

It's time for Show and Tell Friday. If you would like to participate, drop over to Kelli's at There's No Place Like Home.

I'm not sure if I've ever told you that I love roosters - not live ones so much but I love rooster collectibles. One day last summer I was at the dollar store and saw this beautiful rooster. It was the last one and I really wanted it. I looked at it for several minutes, knowing that this guy would look GREAT sitting on my side porch railing and then sat it back on the shelf. The owner of the dollar store saw me do this and offered me the garden ornament for less than half price. That was exactly the price I could afford and the rooster had a new home.

Last fall, I asked hubby to put this guy in the basement. I thought he had done so, but when I went looking for him this year, I couldn't find him. Hubby says he never put him in the basement. Well, I can bet your bottom dollar that he is down there, but since we have to go outside to get to the basement, I haven't been down there all winter. One day over the weekend I will take a look and I bet I find him. If not, he has found a home at someone else's house.

I want to tell you a bit more about Brandon's autism. Have you ever been in a store and saw a child throw a gigantic temper tantrum. I have, and before Brandon was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome, I always thought, "If I was that child's mother..."

When Brandon was about just a baby, he began throwing what we thought was temper tantrums. Sometimes it would seem that it was over nothing. We couldn't figure out why he was doing this. Once he was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome, we knew that he wasn't throwing a temper tantrum, but was "melting down."

The first time I ever saw Brandon doing this, Grandpa and I were taking him out. He was about 7 months old. He was in his car seat in the back and he began screaming. I talked to him and tried to get him to stop, but it only got worse. Finally, I told my husband to stop on the side of the road so I could figure out what was wrong. I opened the back door - it was a hot summer day - and Brandon was soaking wet because of the heat and of course because he was screaming. I checked his clothes to see if something was picking or biting him. Nothing. I was bewildered. Finally I took off his shoes and socks, thinking that maybe his shoes were pinching him. Immediately he stopped crying. I thought this was odd, but though possibly it was the shoes.

Over time, we came to realize that when Brandon screamed like this that he was too hot. Though he seldom has a meltdown anymore, if Brandon gets too hot, he is always in a bad mood. For years he didn't know how to communicate his feelings. A simple, "I'm too hot" never came out of his mouth. He just acted out. It took us a long time to figure out why he acted like this.

When Brandon was about eight or nine, I was watching the boys one day after school. Brandon had been "acting out" for a few days. Michelle and I couldn't figure out what was wrong. It was a guessing game and a little like mind reading. When Brandon started acting out this particular day, my patience grew a little thin. (Yes, I am human.) I said, "Brandon, you have to tell me what is wrong." I was very frustrated and my voice very stern. He answered, "This hair! It's driving me crazy," and he pulled at his hair.

Because Brandon has a problem with heat, Michelle has his hair buzzed in an attempt to keep him cool. When Michelle came home, I told her what had happened and the next morning she took him and had his hair cut in a brush cut. That was the end of the acting out. His hair was literally driving him crazy, just as he said. Today when his hair gets too long, which can be only an inch on top of his head, he asks us to take him for a hair cut. He is now communicating his feelings.

It has been difficult to always know just why Brandon was "acting out." I have many more stories to tell, but they are for another day. So the next time you see a child throwing a temper tantrum in a public place, don't be too quick to judge. Yes, it may be an old fashioned temper tantrum, or it might be a sign that this child has a problem communicating his feelings and is "acting out."

Be sure to stop by Mary's Vintage Flea Market to find out what treasures I have up for sale this week and be sure to visit the other Friday Flea Market participants.

Have wonderful weekend and take a moment to do a random act of kindness. Sometimes all it takes is a smile to brighten someone's day. ~Blessings, Mary~

Wednesday, April 2

Blessed with Babies

Our family is growing. We are being blessed with babies. Let me show you the beautiful babies that God has blessed our family with.
These boys are my great-nephews, Dakota and Jackson. These are my brother's grandchildren. I haven't seen the boys yet because at Easter they were moving here from up north - a five hour drive. Notice the yawn.
Here they are fast asleep. Aren't they adorable? I love babies and just sent my nephew an email telling him I just HAVE to see the boys. They were born on December 19th, just in time for Christmas. Of course they've just moved down here so I'm waiting to go to see them until the family is settled.
This is Evan. He is also my great-nephew and my brother's grandson. I haven't seen Evan yet either. Mom's been very tired and so I haven't bothered her.
Doesn't he look so content here? Evan was born on February 28th. He just missed being a leap year baby.
And Griffyn is growing like a weed. He is an adorable little boy. He laughs and chortles with glee. He is discovering the world.
Here he is driving a car at the laundromat. Looks to me like he might be a race car driver one day.
And look at this. He's laughing out loud. Griffyn was born on June 28, 2007. Mom is expecting another baby in August. Griffyn is either really happy or really sad. There doesn't seem to be any in-between. Usually he is in a good mood.

Griffyn was tested to see how he was performing for his age level. He is nine months old and he is at a one-year level. Here he is climbing the stairs. He is a going concern. He knows that he isn't to go up the stairs, but that is what he likes to do. He has just discovered he can do it and wants to do it whether it's against the rules or not.

Here he's looking right at Mom as if to say, "I can do it!" Dad is behind him in case he falls and Mom has the camera. Melissa, his mother has a good sense of humor. I fear she is going to need it when the new baby comes.

I was presented with the award above by Greatful Living and also by Storyteller at Small Reflections. I was very honored to get it from two ladies on the same day. Thank you both. You made my day much brighter.
Above is the autism awareness ribbon. I have posted about autism the last two days because this is Autism Awareness Month.

Yesterday I mentioned that we believed Brandon's autism was connected to his one-year vaccination. Let me add to that. We did notice that Brandon started stimming (a term that I learned from another blogger today.) after his vaccination. He would cry and flap his hands wildly. By the time he was two, he had a little dance that we thought was cute. When he became excited he would do a dance, flap his arms and hands and then bring one knee up and his elbow down - kind of like the dance that is done after a touchdown in football. Later we learned that this was a sign of autism.

I don't want to mislead anyone. We do know that in order for the autism to appear, Brandon had to have the gene. Another sign of autism is a larger than normal head. When Brandon was born, he had a very large head. My daughter did have a natural birth, but Brandon's head was very mishapen when he was born. Today, at almost thirteen years old, his head is as large as an adult's.

While doing a little research today I happened upon an article about research that was done at the University of Western Ontario. Apparently researchers have found a gut-brain connection to autism. To read the article, go HERE.

I will be writing more about autism this month. It is a subject near and dear to my heart. The general population needs to be educated on the subject of autism so they can better understand the disorder.

If you would like to visit other blogs that are posting in recognition of Austism Awareness Month, please follow the links below.

By visiting all of these sites and reading the posts, you will become more understanding of what autism means to those living with it and to their families.

Tuesday, April 1

About Brandon and Asperger's Syndrome

The photo above is an old photo of Brandon. It was about grade 4 or 5, so he would have been nine or ten years old. See the way he holds his mouth. He is trying to smile because the school photographer thinks all the parents will want their kids smiling in the photos. Since this was taken we have requested that when the boys have their school photos taken that the photographer doesn't ask them to smile. This is a "pose." Brandon is the type of person who only smiles if there is something to smile about. Most of his photos do not include a smile. I guess he takes after me. I am not a smiler either.

Yesterday I posted about Asperger's Syndrome because April is International Autism Awareness Month. Some of my readers asked some questions and I would like to address them, plus let you all know some of the problems that children with Asperger's Syndrome face.

First, I will address the questions. Someone asked if we connected Brandon's Asperger's to his vaccinations. He was six years old before he was formally identified. When he was little, about two years old, he had a fixation with Hot Whe*el cars. He would line them up rigidly. The line of cars had to be perfectly aligned. If one was out of line or if we moved them, he would put them back and line them up perfectly once again. At the time, we thought this was cute. Little did we know it was a sign that something was wrong. In hindsight we connect his twelve month needle with his autism. It is the measles, mumps and rebella needle, aka MMR. Today it is sometimes referred to as the "autism needle."

Brandon had a lot of problems when he was young. He had trouble making friends at school and still does but to a lesser extent. I think this is because he hangs around with other boys who likes the same things as he does. It gives him something to discuss and they play together. He also had trouble reading body language, which is typical of children with Asperger's Syndrome. We used exaggerated facial expressions and body language to teach him. We would frown, pretend to be crying, exaggerate our smiles and fold our arms across our chest. Then we would ask him what it meant and explain why we were acting as we were. By doing this, we taught him to recognize body language and facial expressions. He has a good handle on this now.

People with Asperger's Syndrome often have trouble recognizing sarcasm and cliches. Brandon does recognize sarcasm now, but still sometimes has trouble with cliches. Sometimes I'll say something to him and he'll ask me what I mean. I explain in simple terms and then he "gets it."

Another thing that we taught Brandon was to ask when he didn't understand something. At one time if he didn't "get it," he would puzzle over it for days. Now he asks what it means and we explain in simple terms. He is learning every day.

In November 2005, Brandon went into a deep depression. He would cry all the time and missed a lot of days off school. He said he didn't know why he was crying and we couldn't figure it out. One day in late November, he and Jordan came over to go sledding right after a big snow storm. As we were walking across to the park, his eyes filled up with tears. I stopped while hubby and Jordan went ahead. I told him, "Brandon, you have to tell Grandma why you are so sad all the time." He looked me in the eye (another thing we had to teach him because people with Asperger's Syndrome avoid eye contact) and said, "I'm afraid you're going to die."

It felt like I'd been punched in the stomach. I asked him, "Why would you think that?" He said, "I heard you and Mom talking and know that you have cancer."

I had a small cancerous growth on the bridge of my nose and I guess he'd heard me and Michelle talking about me having to go to have it removed. I explained that this kind of cancer would not kill Grandma and that my brother had had it for fifteen years. I explained that once it was removed, I would have a little red spot on the bridge of my nose for a few days. Then that would be it. Brandon seemed content with that and though he didn't get over his depression overnight, he improved greatly.

When Brandon's depression hit, he began to hoard garbage. He would hide wrappers from food and anything else in his bedroom closet. He didn't want anything to go into the garbage. His parents and I worked with him constantly and though he still hides stuff once in a while, he is 95% better. He was diagnosed with a touch of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, which can go along with the Asperger's Syndrome.

Brandon has improved greatly in the last four years, thanks to an understanding Vice Principal who worked with him for two years. She made a big difference in Brandon's life and helped us to teach him lifeskills that he needed. Before she was a Vice Principal, she had been a Special Education teacher and she definitely knew her stuff.

There is so much to Asperger's Syndrome that I could write on it for days on end and still not tell you all that we have learned. I will be glad to answer any questions and try to share my knowledge and that of Michelle in order to bring more awareness to Asperger's Syndrome.

I want to thank everyone for their comments on yesterday's article and their interest in becoming more educated about autism, yet I don't want to bore you. I have been studying the subject for the last six years and still don't know a great deal about it. Asperger's Syndrome is a definite mystery and people who have it perceive things much differently than the average person. It is likened to a tapestry where the average person sees the entire thing. Those with Asperger's Syndrome see every thread. It is hard to imagine sometimes what Brandon is seeing, but I do ask him to explain it to me. The more he tells me about what he sees, the more I can try to understand. Thanks for following this to the end. It is all quite complicated. ~Blessings, Mary~

Monday, March 31

April is International Autism Awareness Month

April 2, 2008 is International Autism Awareness Day!

April is special to me because it is Autism Awareness Month and I love someone with autism. My oldest grandson, Brandon, is high functioning autistic. Brandon has Asperger's Syndrome, which is on the autism spectrum.

The word "spectrum" as used in this instance refers to a continum of severity of developmental impairment." Those who suffer from disorders on the autism spectrum have problems with communication and socialization that are similar but the conditions range over a very wide spectrum. Severity can range from very mild to extremely severe.

When people speak of Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) they are usually referring to the three most common, which are:

* Asperger's Disorder: aka Asperger's Syndrome or AS.

* Autistic Disorder: classic autism.

* PDD-NOS: Pervasive Developmental Disorder Not Otherwise Specified.

Adults and children who suffer from ASDs all have difficulty with communication and social interaction in varying degrees. They can also suffer from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and form attachments to odd things or have unusual routines, which could best be described as rituals. They also often do things repetatively and hoard. No two people with ASD acts or responds exactly the same when put into circumstances that are identical. Each individual has his/her own unique symptoms and responses.

There are five Pervasive Developmental Disorders. They are:

* Asperger's Syndrome.

* Autistic Disorder.

* Childhood Disintegrative Disorder aka CDD

* PDD-NOS, as described above.

* Rhett's Disorder.

Here are a few statistics:

Asperger's Syndrome - This is quite common. 15,000 Canadians suffer from this disorder and possibly even more. Asperger's Syndrome, though discovered in 1939, by Hans Asperger, wasn't recognized in North America until the mid 1990s. This means that hundreds of adults may suffer from the disorder and not know it. Asperger's Syndrome can affect both boys and girls, but is more prominent in boys.

Autistic Disorder - Very common. 73,000 Canadians have Autistic Disorder.

CDD - Rare. Only 500 Canadians have Childhood Disintegrative Disorder.

PDD-NOS - Common. 47,000 Canadians.

Rhett's Disorder - Rare. Only 3,150 Canadians have been diagnosed with Rhett's. My great-niece has it, though only a very mild case. Rhett's Disorder can affect both boys and girls but is more prominent in girls.

Other Related Conditions:

* Tourette's Syndrome.

* Down Syndrome.

* Landau-Kleffner Syndrome.

* Prader-Willi Syndrome.

If you would like more information on autism:

Autism Society of America

Canadian Autism Society

Autism Ontario

Autism Treatment Services of Canada

There will be an Autism Ontario Art Auction at St. Lawrence Hall, Toronto on Wednesday May 21, 2008. For more information, please click HERE.

Have a wonderful week and please, educate yourself about autism. Those living with it need your understanding and prayers. ~Blessings, Mary~

Sunday, March 30

A Visit to the Sugar Bush

Every year, Mom and I try to take the boys to the sugar bush. We sample the syrup, learn about maple syrup and maple sugar making, visit the old time buildings in the pioneer village and have lunch - pancakes, sausage and real maple syrup. We like to take them during March Break but this year was too cold and nasty. Today was the last day for the Maple Syrup Festival and the weather was to be nice so we planned to go.

The weather cooperated as much as we could have expected it to. I was windy and a bit chilly but not so bad that we were uncomfortable. We arrived at Westfield Heritage Village about 11:30.
The first thing we saw, above, was the old cast iron kettle on the tripod. This is a tough way to make maple syrup, as it takes 40 gallons of sap to make one gallon of maple syrup, but this is the way that maple syrup was made in the pioneer days. Before that, Native Canadians made maple syrup by felling a tree, burning it out to make a trough and putting hot rocks in the sap to make it boil. How times have changed.

We were waiting for the horse and wagon to take us to the sugar bush and Jordan was happy. Brandon, on the other hand, thought we should walk. He was impatient to get there. He also didn't want his photo taken at this time. Notice the hand up to block my view.
Before long we saw the horse and wagon coming. Being a farm girl, I love the seeing the team. Here is the driver coming to let one group of people off and pick another group up.
He let us off at the path to the sugar bush. Believe it or not the ride wasn't too bumpy. It's been far worse other years.
Above is the maple trees with the sap buckets attached. I can remember helping Grandpa tap the trees and it was a lot of work. I loved it. We never thought of it as work, but fun. Of course we were kids.
Here is Jordan checking the sap bucket to see how much sap is in it. Mom was with him, but she stepped back just as I took the photo. I love her hat.
There goes Mom and Jordan turned around and asked me to take his picture. He isn't usually so willing. Maybe it was the different environment or maybe he just wanted some memories of the sugar bush. He asked me to print him some photos and I told him I would. I think I'll make him a little album for his birthday.

Here is Brandon. He was way ahead of us and was waiting, not too patiently by the sugar shanty.

Jordan and I looked in one of the sap buckets and the sap was frozen in the bottom. That is frozen sap you are seeing.
I went to take a photo of Brandon who was hiding behind a tree and he started to run. Grandma was too fast for him. I got him in mid stride. LOL

Here are more sap buckets on the sugar maples. I love the shadows on the snow. The wood on the ground will be used to fire up the stove in the sugar shanty. The heat has to be very intense if you want good maple syrup. The best maple syrup is a golden color. Darker syrup doesn't have the keen maple taste.

Here is a volunteer making maple syrup. Notice the pans are stainless steel nowadays. When I was young they were galvanized tin. These are not used anymore, as galvanized tin allowed a lot of heavy metal to leach into the syrup.

Jordan asked me to take another photo of him tasting his sample of maple syrup. I obliged.

Brandon is inspecting the sap bucket to see how full it is. Finally, he's getting into the swing of things.

He even posed for both Mom and I to take a photo. His Dad and Grandpa have him brainwashed about having his picture taken. LOL Neither of them like it so I guess he things men shouldn't want to have their picture taken.

After we were educated on how maple syrup is made, we headed into the village proper. For you ladies that like tea, the photo above is of an old fashioned tea house.

And this is the door and sign of the tea house. Maroon and green. I wonder if those are the original colors. They kind of remind me of Victorian colors. And that sign... see the ornate cast iron bracket that holds the sign. I love this type of vintage hardware.

In the village is a train that rusted badly. A few years ago there was a big push to raise money to restore it. I think it was three years ago that the project was finished. That steam engine looks brand new now. It is an original from the Toronto, Hamilton and Buffalo Railroad. It's a beauty.

Above is the hardware store. All of these buildings are the originals. I can imagine how full of tools this store would have been in its heyday.

A beautiful gazebo. I love gazebos and would love to have one just like this in my yard. Hubby and I priced one last summer. The price tag floored us. $10,000.

This is where the boys were headed... the General Store. It is open to the public and they have candy and other things for sale. Some things are only for display. Notice the small barrels and crates outside. This is much how it would have looked in days gone by.
Brandon and Jordan waiting to buy some old fashioned candy sticks. They were both being very patient. Notice the mob cap just behind Brandon's right shoulder.

Here is the display again. Notice the old fashioned shoes and the material and baskets on the shelves. These are for display purposes only, but the girl's mob caps are for sale at $5.00 each.

Above is a beautiful vintage glass display case and the Easter display was delightful. I couldn't resist taking a photo of it.

For you ladies who enjoy tea, here is a tea display. Notice the vintage cups. And all the goodies that are in that case look delicious.

The boys choosing their candy sticks. There are so many different kinds to choose from and they had a hard time deciding, which all the children did.

I was going to take a photo of the old one-room school and Jordan wanted to be in it. LOL He sure did like having his photo taken today. Notice the Union Jack flag flying on the school. When the village was in its heyday Canada was under British rule. That was our flag.

Then on toward the village gates. The boys stopped to have their photo taken. Notice the old fashioned style white candy bags.

We had pancakes and sausage with real maple sugar at the restaurant and then on to the parking lot for the ride home. We all enjoyed ourselves and I hope you enjoyed hearing about our day. Have a great week. ~Blessings, Mary~