Wednesday, May 14

Where are the Parents?

All of my regular readers will know my grandsons, Brandon (in green) and Jordan. Now these boys are no angels, but let me tell you what happened last week.

On Thursday when I went to pick the boys up to take them to the farm, Brandon told me that one of the boys at school had literally picked Jordan up and threw him against a parked car. I had meant to tell their parents, but things got hectic when we arrived back at the house and it slipped my mind. (Bad Grandma.)

Saturday was hubby's birthday and the boys and Mom came over for BBQd burgers and birthday cake, plus Mother's Day celebrations. Usually if something happens at school the boys tell me, but Saturday they never said a word. I hadn't seen them on Friday and didn't see them Sunday.

On Monday morning at 8:45 am, the phone rang. Hubby answered it and brought it to me. He said someone was asking for Brandon's grandma. I knew right away it was the school and sure enough it was Brandon's teacher. He asked me if I knew about what happened on Friday and I said "No."

I gave him Michelle's cell phone number so he could call her. She was on her way out of town to do some business with Barry. She called me after Brandon's teacher had spoken to her.
This is the story: On Friday afternoon, Brandon and Jordan set out from school. Brandon had caught a particular boy going through Jordan's backpack and taking his stuff. Brandon reported the theft to the teacher and the boy got into a lot of trouble. Well, on the way home, the boy and his friend caught up to our boys and there was a confrontation. As I said, our boys aren't angels. However, the same boy that threw Jordan against the car on Thursday night, did it again. This time Jordan became angry. When the boy got on his bike, Jordan knocked him off of it. He then picked Jordan up and threw him into the middle of the street and proceded to pound on Brandon with his fists.

The boys that attacked our boys made a huge mistake. They caught up to our boys just two doors down from where they live. Barry was in the bathroom shaving (he's on nightshift) when he heard a kid screaming and realized it was Jordan. He went to the living room window just in time to see the boy throw Jordan into the street. Immediately he went outside and told the boy that he was to get off the property and not come back and that he was calling his parents.
The boy's father told Barry he was glad he had called him and not the police. Apparently this boy, who is either 12 or 13, is on probation and if Barry had called the police he would have been in big trouble. He said the problem would be dealt with and asked for names and specific details.
On Monday morning, Brandon's teacher was calling because the episode had been reported to the school. He told Michelle that the police should be called, but since the boy's father had promised to deal with the problem they didn't take that action.

Yesterday when I picked the boys up from school, (yes, we are driving them and picking them up again) they told me the only punishment the boys who did this received was standing in the hall for nutrition breaks. To me, this doesn't sound like a harsh enough punishment. What if there had been a car coming? Jordan could have been killed in an instant.

What I would like to know is, where are the parents of kids that do this kind of thing? For that matter, why isn't the school doing more to protect kids that are walking home from school? It seems we have to pick the boys up from school in order for them to be safe, which should never happen. I have spoken to the principal and vice principal about other incidents of bullying and they don't seem very interested in stopping it, yet bullying is against the law in Ontario. Yes, our government passed a bill against bullying.

I'd like to see both parents and school officials made responsible for protecting our children when they are under their care. If our children can't attend school and feel safe, where can they feel safe?

An now, off my soapbox... I'm interested in hearing if any of you have had a bullying problem where the parents and school didn't seem to care. Is this why kids bring guns to school?
Have a wonderful day. ~Blessings, Mary~


  1. How frightening.. I'm so glad Brandon was not seriously hurt.. I have a 14 year old son now... and the stuff that happens in school is sometimes terrifying..Although we are not a city school, the county has lots of problems too. I wish so much that I could change their school, but We have our house paid for and this is not a time to be selling and moving.. I am trying to be more active in the communtiy schools, with the PTA and such, but it seems like no-one even cares..
    I feel the frustration too..
    They should have been punished, not just a "slap on the hand"..
    Stay Strong...

  2. I am so relieved that your Grandchildren are not hurt. For a child to be in harms way at school and little to no action is taken simply burns me to a crisp. These people are responsible for our children that we entrust in their care for the better part of the day.... If this child gets by with little or no consequence for his actions what will he do when he is older.

    I am praying about this....Mary

  3. Dear Mary,
    So relieved that your grandsons did not suffer serious injury. Sadly, I think there is more and more bullying going on. Our grandsons attend private school and most of the kids are dropped off and picked up. I rarely see any walking.
    Our daughter is a public school teacher and the stories she tells just make me so glad our grandsons are not in that environment.
    Sad testimony to the state of the public school system.

  4. I, personally, never had that experience. And I wouldn't with that on either side of anyone...the kids/parents involved. I can say the punishment was NOT enough. And I would say that since it's been reported to the school itself...I would think that your S I L should contact the police afterall. You say there is a law against it? Then, the law was broken...parent handling this is obviously a thing that probably didn't happen.

    It's never too late. If it isn't your could be someone else. And I wouldn't want that on my conscience.

    There should be strict action taken, beginning with a report to the police.


  5. I understand that bullying in schools is becoming a real serious problem...they even like to film it and put it on the internet...
    I'm not sure what the solution will be...because the schools seem afraid to do anything about it...

  6. That is too scary, so sorry this happened. I praise God that Brandon is ok.

  7. I agree with Hoot...... there should be a greater punishment than he got.... and yes I think that law enforcement should be involved in this...... this is the very reason that children are taking matters into their own hands.... There is such viloence in the schools today..... I did not have to deal with this at all with my boys....... I am so sorry that the boys are having to go through this....... if it were my son or grandson the school would be taking some serious action with this young man before he does something worse...... I think that your SIL should make a visit to the school and to the local police office.... bless those precious boys hearts!!!

  8. That is absolutely horrible! I think that Barry handled it well I dont know your boys, only through blog, and I want to beat that kids hiney. I think that parents just don't take the time to deal with kids (oh dear, now you have me on my soap box). They do now want to be bothered by them. They like to sit them in front of the tv or run them off into the neighbor hood to do what ever they feel like doing. Arrggg people do upset me so bad. I am so sorry that all this happened to your boys and I am so thankful that they are ok! Now for my bully story, so far my kids have been blessed and have not been bullied that much, but my sister who is 11 has been bullied. She came home not long ago and this little girl has been talking about her. The girl is supposed to be her friend, but friends don't call each other wh@#es. THey just don't do it. She will not talk to my mom she always comes to me and let me tell you I was upset. Unfortunatly Salena would not let me call the school about it.

  9. We have had issues with Julia and bullies on the bus.
    Our schools have very strict rules. Our buses have video cameras and if the kids even use bad language they are not allowed to ride the bus.
    When one of the girls on teh bus told Julia that she would bloody her nose if she said anything she came home and told me.The girl was removed from the bus right away.
    I don't think children become bullies for no reason...there is usually something going on at home.
    I am sorry for what your little guys went through. I am glad they were together to protect and look our for each other.
    We went through some of these times when I was little and walking to school. My brother and I looked out for each other.
    I guess it is hard for schools to watch out for the kids when they are not on school property.
    I am glad they were willing to take action even though it did not happen on the school campus. You never help kids when you do not have them face the consequences of their actions. A bully usually grows up to be a bully.

  10. Mary
    When Puppy was in second grade and afraid to go into the school and to his class by himself, I told Prince it was time to bite the bullet and check out a priviate school. He went and stayed one day at the private school as a trial day and the that evening the school called and said he could enroll the next day. As I was preparing the paperwork in the office, Puppy danced around and wanted to go on to class. I asked if he did not wish for me to walk him there since it was at the end of a very long hallway. No he wanted to go. I was so comforted that he felt safe and yes it was a Church school, David Lipscomb and I am forever gratful that we sent him. He had planned to go to the University of Alabama, been accepted and a down payment was put on his dorm. Then at the eleventh hour, he asked if it was okay if he stayed and went to the University at Lipscomb. Needless to say, I was very happy.
    Public Schools made a big big mistake when they took God out of schools.
    Glad to hear the boys were okay but the school system needs Kitty Justice to take over and we would make lots of folks unhappy and mad but we could fix it. First, Bullies need to have to do community service. I can hear the money hounds now, the cost the cost. Well I have a simple answer, if we do not take care of our children then how can we take care of our nation.
    Sorry my fingers ran on.
    Peace be with you.

  11. Oh Mary, I hear too many stories like that. My friend Jenn has a son with Asperger's and he has been bullied for years! Sometimes the school listens and sometimes not and usually the kids parents are as bad ads the one doing the bullying. It is so sad! You are in my thoughts! hugs, Linda

  12. I find the schools UN equipped to handle this sort of thing.. The experience comes from my GRANDSONS

    The police should be involved as they will take care of it.

    As for the street issue
    two college boys here did the same
    thing..AND a car WAS
    one of them is DEAD.

    it's not a harmless childish prank
    it's violence and it HAS to be STOPPED or it will escalate
    and just knowing that boy has been
    in trouble before, shows it's a pattern.

    I hate the boys have to deal with's NOT right..

    love ya

  13. School is becoming more like prison around here. If a child falls behind, he is placed in the troubled classes. Teachers have no control in those classes and even if a child wanted to learn he couldn't. Some of those teachers just bide their time until the bells ring... marking time till they can retire...

    I've been called by a grandnephew to please come get him. I was not on the list and could not do it. After the latest episode, his grandmother told me I am now on the list. We will do what we can to help this child succeed!

  14. Mary,

    This is awful! I'm relieved that neither Brandon nor Jordan were seriously hurt. But as you said, it could easily have turned very dangerous. I agree with you, the parents and the school should be held accountable. The boy's punishment was nothing. I doubt very much that it made him think he should change his behavior.

    Around here, the laws about bullying are pretty strict. But for the school to be involved, the bullying has to occur on the school grounds or on the bus or at a bus stop. What happened near the boys' house, would not have involved the school. However, the first incident would have. If the boy had already been cited for bullying or stealing, his chances would be up. The police would be called by the school - it's how the law is written.

    If the parents and the school continue to protect this boy, he will never learn until the day he is in jail because he really hurt someone. And that is the tragedy.

    Thank you for sharing this Mary.